Samir occasionally goes to Saudi cafes known to be popular gay hangouts, but his public engagements stop there. 'Before you make a move you have to think.' 'You can't let a word slip that makes you seem gay-friendly or gay,' he says. At work, Samir watches his words, careful not to arouse the suspicion of colleagues. They constantly set him up with women they consider potential wives. He says his mom would kill herself if she found out. Samir's parents don't know of his lifestyle. To feel free he takes long vacations to Thailand, where he has a boyfriend, and spends weekends in Lebanon, which he regards as having a more gay-tolerant society.īut at home in Saudi Arabia, he is vigilant. Samir, like many gay men in the Arab world, guards his sexual orientation with a paranoid secrecy. But I know that I'm gay and I'm living as one, so I can't see a clear vision for the future.'
'I pray to God to help me be straight, just to avoid hell. I know it's forbidden, but I can't help it,' he tells ABC News, clearly conflicted. He lives in Mecca, the holiest city according to Islam, and is acutely aware of the stigma that surrounds his gay lifestyle. DUBAI, United Arab Emirates, — - For Samir*, a 34-year-old gay man living in Saudi Arabia, each day is a denial.
